The life and times of me

Worst. Summer. Ever.

2009-10-24T10:52:00.002-04:00

Wow, how motivated was I the last time I posted something? Quite, it appeared. Well, just having a diagnosis is not enough. I have run into some other obstacles...such as Hyperurecemia. My uric acid level in my blood is high. Almost gout. Old me get gout, not me. Guess again. My joints, while not swollen, hurt like hell, making it impossible for me to loose one ounce of extra weight because I can not exercise. This is becoming tiresome.

There is only one thing I can do, and that is try again (and again and again and again if I have to). My goal for today is to just get my mess of a house back in order (and to get my family on board so that the daily unordering of things ceases.) Tomorrow I would like to get some extra rest, maybe carve pumpkins with the kids and get ready for the week ahead. I go back to the rheumatologist on Tuesday, so hopefully she will have something positive to say.

For now, it is time for motrin and flexeril so that I can move.

Loving it.

I'm baaaaaack!!

2009-08-07T08:52:00.002-04:00

It has been a while, and a lot has happened to me while I was away. I have spent the past eight months feeling pretty lousy for the most part. After much frustration and many medical tests and doctor's office visits, it would appear the cause has been identified!! I got a diagnosis of Lupus and Fibromyalgia. While I am not pleased, I must say I do feel a great sense of relief knowing that I am not crazy nor a hypochondriac - because, believe me, I was really starting to feel like one!

So where do I go from here. Well, I have had a great inspiration for the past fifteen or so years. have watched my mother deal with the same illnesses since she was diagnosed then. (Because, lucky me, auto-immune diseases happen to like to prey upon families...stupid genetics!) So, I know I can live with this, and not just get through a day, but actually live. This summer all I have done is get through a day. So I started some new medications, so that added to the overall taking care of myself better, as I have been doing since all of this started, perhaps I will get some relief and rest. Maybe I will even have the strength to start working out again - I crave the energy that exercise gives me!

So I will be patient a while longer, pushing myself to do a little more each day to enjoy it. The kids and I discussed what we will be doing in regards to school this year, and they want to continue homeschooling. They both understand how important it is that they do their work and listen while I teach them. They have also helped me create what will be our "lesson plan", so I think that is getting them excited. We are officially starting on August 24, and they are both looking forward to learning more! That helps!!

So that is the story...more soon!

February

2009-02-04T13:00:00.001-05:00

It is now...the stupid groundhog saw his shadow. It is cold. I am over winter. Totally.

All thanks to my husband...

2009-01-23T12:56:00.002-05:00

I got home from work and felt like hell warmed over twice. I had to run some errands, and really needed the kids to cooperate - Gabriel woke up having a bad day...that is NEVER good. Scott, knowing how bad I have been feeling, suggested that I bribe the kids with a trip to Build a Bear to spend their gift cards and Bear Bucks, or whatever they are called, that we have collected over the past month or two. So, after getting irritated in line because we had the S-L-O-W-E-S-T cashier ever ringing us up, I need to remind myself that there is a reason behind everything.

As we were walking to the door to get to the parking deck, I saw her standing next to the stroller, attending to her daughter as they prepared to leave the mall. Lisa...(schmang...long story). I had not seen her in YEARS! I have never forgiven myself for missing her wedding, and after she married just completely lost her. So sad...we were like sisters. I have missed her this whole time! And then all of a sudden, there she was, standing twenty feet from me!! What a happy day!

We chatted for a few minutes and discovered we were both on facebook so she promised to "friend" me when she got home. After chatting for maybe ten minutes, its like she has been there all along. We still have A LOT of catching up to do, but at least we can!

All thanks to the suggestion of my husband! Thanks Scott! I love you!

Les Miserables

2009-01-22T12:20:00.003-05:00

Not looking for sympathy, just sharing my life.
I have been very sick...it all goes back to November. I found out that I had a large fibroid in my uterus, and had it removed surgically. That was the beginning of the snowball. I haven't felt right since...it has morphed. I have negative energy. Just sitting her typing is hard. I am sad (and I already know that I meed the criteria for depression, which is why I am taking an anti depressant.) I just want to feel like me again. My liver is screwed up and I have to go in for repeat bloodwork all the time. I spent my birthday in the hospital. I am producing gall stones, but I don't have a gall bladder. This probably explains the elevated liver levels, because where else does it have to go?? I can't eat without my stomach hurting or rejecting what I ingested. I more than likely have some kind of auto immune disease...whatever that disease is has yet to be determined. It could be a while before it is determined.

For now, all I want to do is sleep. I force myself to get up and do things, but it hurts to do that. I can not win right now.

Happy New Year

2009-01-02T11:14:00.002-05:00

I know, I know...its been a long time since I posted anything....it has been busy!! First of all, I had surgery in November and felt horrible for a while afterward. Then it was Thanksgiving...Gabriel's birthday...everyone got sick...then all of a sudden, as if out of nowhere, it was Christmas! It seemed like it came up so fast! Other than me being sick on Christmas Day, the holidays were nice, although I don't feel like I had chance to enjoy the build up to them like I usually do - not enough time! New Year's Eve was fun...we went to our neighbor's house and played board games. We had a blast!! Everyone make it to midnight. The kids were very excited! Plus, all we had to do was walk 30 feet home. Not bad!

So on to 2009. I have decided to follow the lead of a friend of mine, and not call them resolutions, but rather life changes. Here is what I hope to accomplish this year...

1. Do everything in my power to be the best mother and wife possible - I never feel like I do enough!

2. Make more time for me...which I really do not do! It will probably will have a better time of number one if I do this!!

3. A complete lifestyle change that includes proper diet, exercise and enough sleep! I am hoping to lose about 55 pounds this year. I am sick and tired of being sick and tired. It is time to help myself out of it!

4. I would like to become more organized. Perhaps increasing my sleep with aid in this!

5. Try to work on the book I started and maybe even finish it!

Ummm..that is all I can think of for now...I don't want to try too many things and fail, so maybe this is enough!

Happy New Year all!

Ahhh...to be all washed up...

2008-11-25T10:46:00.000-05:00

http://www.bestweekever.tv/2008/11/25/4-signs-that-joey-fatone-just-flushed-whatever-last-dribble-of-integrity-he-had-left-down-the-times-square-toilet/

Isn't this what kids do??

2008-11-23T08:12:00.001-05:00

http://www.drudge.com/news/115219/florida-youth-arrested-farting

Love a little passive aggressiveness in the morning

2008-11-20T06:50:00.001-05:00

http://www.passiveaggressivenotes.com/

TOO FUNNY!

Happy Thanksgiving...

2008-11-12T06:23:00.002-05:00

YIKES!! Just an FYI...a typical Thanksgiving Dinner can have about 4000 calories.

4000!!

Enjoy!

Poppies

2008-11-11T02:07:00.002-05:00

"The poppy's significance to Remembrance Day is a result of Canadian military physician John McCrae's poem In Flanders Fields. The poppy emblem was chosen because of the poppies that bloomed across some of the worst battlefields of Flanders in World War I, their red colour an appropriate symbol for the bloodshed of trench warfare. A Frenchwoman, Anna E. Guérin, introduced the widely used artificial poppies given out today. Some people choose to wear white poppies, which emphasises a desire for peaceful alternatives to military action.
The Royal Canadian Legion suggests that poppies be worn on the left lapel, or as close to the heart as possible."

In Flanders Fields
In Flanders fields the poppies blow
Between the crosses, row on row,
That mark our place; and in the sky
The larks, still bravely singing, fly
Scarce heard amid the guns below.
We are the dead. Short days ago
We lived, felt dawn, saw sunset glow,
Loved, and were loved, and now we lie
In Flanders fields.
Take up our quarrel with the foe:
To you from failing hands we throw
The torch; be yours to hold it high.
If ye break faith with us who die
We shall not sleep, though poppies grow
In Flanders fields.
— Lt.-Col. John McCrae

Please take a moment to remember all those in the armed forces who have served their countries!

I just have to say...

2008-10-29T09:28:00.002-04:00

the internet is a great thing for communicating... i get to talk to people regularly that i would not necessarily be able to as much.

however...there is nothing like hearing the voice of someone you love when you haven't heard it for a while...very uplifting!

The light at the end of the tunnel...

2008-10-26T08:04:00.002-04:00

I think...I am feeling a little bit better. It all started as some kind of respiratory nightmare and then morphed into an even worse GI nightmare...night TERROR! Every time I start to feel a little bit better and decide to try and eat, I get sick again. I have been living on Coke and crackers. I seem to have a little bit more energy than I have had the past couple of days, so maybe I can do some laundry! Yay!

I am also hoping that Scott finishes the school room today so that I can move everything out of my dining room and back to its rightful place. We haven't really been doing any traditional school work the last two week just for the simple fact that I can't find anything! It is literally a mountain of crap taking up every possible free space in the dining room. There is a small path to the thermostat so that we may adjust the temperature in the house if necessary! If you really know me, you know how crazy that is making me!

Other than that, we are preparing for Halloween! The kids are very excited! They have their homeschool Halloween party on Wednesday and are looking forward to making our caterpillar cookies! They have also planned a spooky dinner for the big day, and our neighbor Frank is going to hang out with us. Weather permitting, I think we might have a fire outside after trick or treating!

So, that's about it...other than Sydney trying to send her Brownie Troop Leader and me into early graves yesterday when she decided to take off for the bathroom alone and not tell anyone where she was going when she went to see High School Musical 3! I think she learned a valuable lesson...I hope!

So maybe that is a light I see...

NO, I AM NOT PREGNANT!!

2008-10-23T18:31:00.002-04:00

I am really just sick. I spent the afternoon vomiting. Yee haw! I now wait for Scott to return with some Vernors and crackers for me. My head is throbbing, my nose hurts, my whole head actually hurts, my throat is scratchy and I can't sleep. And, I have a fever. So I ache.

And,I think Gabriel is sick too. Let's see...it is 6:30 pm, he is almost 8 and he is asleep. Hmmm.

I felt bad for Sydney - she has Brownie's tonight and daddy had to take her and she just wasn't very sure about that. I assured her everything would be fine, and she told me she would take care of me when she got home, but she REALLY wanted to go to Brownies. She is the sweetest thing!

OK...I am going to put my head down and hope for Scott's speedy return!

I guess the kids can't watch Sesame Street anymore...

2008-10-23T10:49:00.002-04:00

See more funny videos at Funny or Die

Neil Patrick Harris as the Shoe Fairy

2008-10-23T10:46:00.001-04:00

See more funny videos at Funny or Die

Parking your car in a garage is really not such a good idea...

2008-10-23T10:12:00.002-04:00

Take my neighbor George. He has a big pick up truck that is no more than two years old. He babies his cars - they are VERY WELL taken car of - really! So about a week ago, George got home after a long day of working - delivering Pepsi - and all he wanted to do was eat. George has one of the best appetities to witness. It is insane! So he was probably getting ready to dig into a side of beef, when his car alarm started going off. It was about 10 pm, so he didn't want to wake anyone that might be sleeping and he went out side to his truck. Luckily, he parked in the driveway.

The entire front end of his truck was on fire. The fire was so intense that is melted the entire front end of the vehicle. The tires are melted. The whole dash is melted. Everything under the hood is melted. So it sits in his driveway waiting for the insurance adjuster to come and check out the mess. As it turned out, the fire was caused by a wire in the battery that came loose and sparked the fire. He had only been in the truck five minutes earlier.

Now, had his car been in his attached garage, his house would have burned down. The fire was that fast and that hot!

So maybe rethink the garage thing....scraping windows is a good form of exercise!! And much less chance for a fire!

C-R-E-E-P-Y-!-!-!

2008-10-16T23:39:00.002-04:00

Let me start by saying that it is TOTALLY possible that I am just a snotty bitch. (I know, complete stretch, right??) That said, there are some creepy ass people working my shift. I know it takes a special person to work the midnight shift, and in a hospital no less. So we have the mothers who work midnights so they can be there during the day for their kids. There are the people that just hired in and are only working midnights until they can transfer to something during the day. There are about five people in the entire hospital on this shift that do it because they like it. The other people work this shift because I think the sunlight burns their skin. Or eyes, or whatever. Now, I know that there are people in the world that this is a serious affliction for, and for them I feel terrible. These people appear to have made a pact with the devil or something.

Now these could be perfectly nice people. I could be judging (please see sentence #1). For all I know, they work nights so they can patrol the playgrounds in their beat up old vans looking for their next victim. Or maybe they really like completely screwing up their body by being awake working all night. I don't know because I am not here to make friends. I am here because I need a paycheck. And if I happen to have my office all locked up and closed it probably means I don't want to chat.

There is one floor guy in particular that just has to walk past my office about 25 times to sweep over the same spot - leering in here everytime he goes by. I am not that hot, so come on! I don't like it - it makes me uncomfortable. But I can't say anything - what if he isn't a creep? Then I look like a total douchebag.

Maybe I have been watching too much Law and Order. I don't know. I just wish we had blinds on the windows of this fishbowl of an office that I work in...that or that I could win the lottery and not have to work any more. Now, that would be nice...though it would involve me having to purchase a ticket....

My apologies for being a flake

2008-10-15T00:05:00.002-04:00

This is dedicated to my cousin Jim, who's birthday I completely flaked on. I am bad. I am sorry. I am forgetful. You are a better person than! And you don't look old!!!!

LOVE YOU!

I remembered....

2008-10-15T00:02:00.002-04:00

The other dream...ok, so in real life we just got rid of the two most horrible dogs. Maybe they weren't so horrible, but it was a horrible fit. We gave them to a couple and it seemed a perfect fit. A few days later the lady called me back saying she changed her mind. Needless to say, they are still her's.

So my dream was this...I woke up in the morning and heard dogs barking in the garage. I looked outside and the people we gave the dogs to had brought them back and thrown them in the garage after they peeled away the top left portion of the garage door. It scared me.

Crazy F'ed Up Dreams...

2008-10-13T23:31:00.002-04:00

I totally had some crazy dreams this weekend...anyone able to analyze me???

Let us delve, shall we?

The first one I had left me feeling troubled when I awoke. It was about my cousin Jim, whom I am very close with. For some reason in the dream, Jim was not married to his lovely wife, and he was living here (the states). He met a girl that I knew, and I knew had a history of screwing people over. They started dating and she would not let me see him - but he did not realize what was happening. Less and less I saw him until I heard they were getting married. I decided that if he was happy enough with her to marry her then maybe I should give her another chance. So for some reason I ended up buying them a wedding cake. I am not sure what happened next because I do believe I woke up. So whatever that was about...

The other one that I had that I actually remember was that I was pregnant and we thought I was having twins, but as it turned out it was quadruplets. Identical. Scott decided that we would name them in birth order alphabetically, so the first one was Adrian (no idea why - Scott hates that name) and the other three I could not ever remember. For some reason we were getting them ready to go on a talk show. And there were a lot of diapers. Duh, I know, right?

I had another one that I remembered earlier today, but it has escaped me. If it comes back I will share.

That is all.

Counts as fruit, right??

2008-10-10T01:28:00.001-04:00

Just wondering....does 12 ounces of Traverse City Cherry Coffee and two blueberry pop-tarts count as three servings of fruit??

I thought so!

Watch this video...PG Porn..TOO FUNNY!!

2008-10-09T00:27:00.001-04:00

Thank you James Gunn!

Nailing Your Wife | Girls | SPIKE.com

Sometimes parents just don't understand...

2008-10-09T00:05:00.003-04:00

My in-laws do not understand what it is to homeschool. They were completely against it at first - they seem to think that the only way a child can learn is to sit in a classroom with 30 other kids and be trained to be like a herd of sheep. They also seemed to feel that there is no way for children to become socially acceptable unless they are subjected to bullies and made fun of because they are different. Also, it is hard for them to comprehend (so it would seem) to not want to send your kids away for eight plus hours a day to get a break from them.

I am not going to lie - it is hard work homeschooling my kids. It would be hard even if I didn't work full time midnights...but I wouldn't trade it for the world. Maybe its completely selfish, but I wouldn't want to give up what I am getting out of it! And I don't think the kids would have it any other way either.

This evening my husband took the kids to stay overnight at his parents house because he has to take his father to the doctor for an early appointment and I would not have been home from work before he had to leave. His mother asked the kids what kind of schoolwork they did today. OK, two things about that...one (the main reason we accomplished nothing today) I am getting sick and had a throbbing congested head and could not give them the attention they deserved, so the did alternate activities that they don't view as schoolwork because its fun. And two, just what I said...there are many things that I do with them that they learn from that I neglect to tell them is "schoolwork" because then I know the activity will suddenly cease to be fun. Deceptive? Yes. Does it work? YES!!

I thing my in-laws don't understand that when you are teaching two children, it doesn't take eight hours a day to teach them what they need to learn. I have a feeling that they will never understand.

Shoot me now...no, really!

2008-10-07T23:39:00.002-04:00

OK...let me start by saying that I feel like I got hit with a truck. The whole family has been ill, and I fear that they have shared their germs with me. This is what I get for teaching my children the value of sharing and caring. I slept like crap today, despite the fact that I was able to go to bed early because Scott got home early, it just wasn't very restful...probably due to the fact that I am getting sick.

I got up and started getting ready for work...I don't have any idea what happened to my hair while I slept, but maybe it is getting sick too because it was very disagreeable when I was trying to make myself presentable in case I had to see people tonight. Then, I totally got my coffee/milk ratio wrong and it doesn't taste right!

So I arrive at work. I actually got a good parking space right inside the deck so that I was still close to the door but there won't be a bunch of condensation on my windows in the morning and I will just be able to leave and see. That should make the space stalkers in the parking lot happy. I walk in, punch in at 10:59 (yay!!!) and walk over to the elevators. There is a sign that looks like either a four year old or someone from the psych ward wrote saying that that they were scrubbing the floors at my destination, which means I get to spend the next five hours or so listening to the grubby, creepy floor guys talk LOUD. And, when the hallways were re-done they neglected to install plug outlets, so the floor dudes are using MY outlet in my office so I can't even shut the door all the way.

Loooooooooong night ahead of me.

Here it is...

2008-10-07T13:05:00.000-04:00

The new tattoo...

Stuff I like...

2008-10-07T12:38:00.004-04:00

I have come across a few things lately that I LOVE!! Just thought I would share...

The Diving Bell and the Butterfly...I happened to catch the movie on cable...it was WONDERFUL. Very sad, but wonderful. (Plus I am a total sucker for a memoir...) I really want to read the book now because the books are always better than the movie!

Augusten Burroughs blogs on MySpace. I just love reading whatever he has to write.

Also, James Gunn's blogs on MySpace. He cracks me right up! I am totally looking forward to PG Porn on Spike.com

"Me Talk Pretty One Day" David Sedaris. Just finished reading it while on vacation.

Seu Jorge...he did the David Bowie covers in the movie The Life Aquatic with Steve Zissou. Very mellow...love it!

Duffy. Can not get enough...

Pumpkin flavor...pumpkin spice anything to eat or smell...mmmmmmm!

Chocolate Amber lotion from Bath and Body Works. Though I am sad as it would appear they have discontinued the flavor...too bad. :( That or they just haven't brought it back out for the fall, WHICH THEY TOTALLY SHOULD!

Law and Order. I know I always love this - not a recent thing - but I hadn't watched it in a while and saw it yesterday. I love every incarnation of that show!

The color pink. And skulls.

And I LOVE my new tattoo!!!:)

Because I'm awesome...that's why...

2008-10-06T23:48:00.002-04:00

OK, so I usually don't like to brag about myself (but I do)...I am just a big walking contradiction. But hey - at least I recognize it, right??

Anyhow, a little more than a year ago, the director of Surgical Services Business Office and Perioperative Information Services (and whatever other titles they have bestowed upon him since), basically, the BIG boss, announced that he was going to recognize an employee from one of his areas monthly as the Business Office Surgical Services Employee of the Month. I didn't think much of it really at first, because I figured that there were probably about 100 other people that would get it ahead of me...for one, I don't (always) think I am all that special, and two, I am here on midnights, so only a select few get to see how wonderful I am...:)

So today Jeff (Big Boss) announced the September 2008 Employee of the Month and take a guess who it is...???

ME!

Why do I deserve such an honor you ask??

Because I'm awesome...that's why!

63 things you may not know about me...

2008-10-06T10:26:00.000-04:00

63 Annoying Questions

1. Song that always makes you sad?	: All I Want Is You, U2
2. Last thing you bought?	: pizza
3. Last person you argued with?	: scott
4. Do you put Butter before putting the jelly on?	: butter first
5. One of your stuffed animals	: a doll named louann
6. Did you ever own at one time a Nysnc Cd?	: HELL NO!
7. Favorite day of the week?	: Sunday
8. Favorite Sundae topping?	: whipped cream
9. Did you take Piano lessons?	: no
10. Most frequent song played?	: Warwick Avenue by Duffy...right now
11. T.V. show you secretly enjoy?	: Snapped!
12. Would you rather play basketball or hockey?	: Hockey
13. Date someone older or younger?	: I always dated guys older than me, and my husband is older than me
14. One place you could travel right now?	: London
15. Do you use umbrellas?	: When it rains
16. Do you know all the words to the Canadian national anthem?	: I just might
17. Favorite Cheese?	: Provolone
18. Disturbed or My Chemical Romance?	: neither
19. Do you prefer Blondes or Brunettes?	: brunette
20. Best job you ever had?	: mom
21. did you go to your high school prom?	: yep
22. perfect time to wake up?	: there is never a good time to have to wake up
23. perfect time to go to bed?	: any time!
24. do you use your queen right away in chess? ..	: don't play chess
25. Ever been in a car accident?	: a couple
26. closer to mom or dad...or neither?	: mom
27. what age is this exciting life over for you?	: no idea
28. what decade during the 20th century would you have chosen to be a teenager?	: the one I was in suited me fine - the 90s
29. Favorite shoes you have EVER owned?	: doc martens
30. Do you have an article of clothing you have had since you were in high schoo	: no
31. Were you in track and field?	: no
32. Were you ever in a school talent show?	: choir and drama
33. Have you ever written in a library book?	: no
34. Allergic to?	: birch
35. Favorite fruit?	: pineapple
36. Have you watched sex and the city?	: yes
37. Baseball hat or toque?	: baseball hat
38. Do you shampoo first in the shower or soap?	: shampoo
39. Wet the toothbrush or brush dry with the toothpaste?	: we the toothbrush!
40. Pen or pencil?	: pen
41. Have you ever gambled at a casino?	: yes
42. Have you thrown up on a plane?	: no
43. Have you thrown up in a car?	: yes
44. Have you thrown up at work?	: yes
45. Do you scream on roller coasters?	: yes
46. Who was your first prom date?	: Dan
47. Who was your first roommate?	: Kelli
48. What alcoholic beverage did you drink when you got drunk for the first time?	: Boone's Farm or Beer - can't recall...I was drunk!
49. What was your first job?	: paper route
50. What was your first car?	: 1985 Chevy Citation...it looked like an egg
51. When did you go to your first funeral?	: when I was about 11 my godmother's father died
52. How old were you when you first moved away from your hometown?	: We moved ALL THE TIME when I was a kid
53. Who was your first grade teacher?	: Mrs. Junod
54. Where did you go on your first airplane ride?	: Technically to Wisconsin - we had a layover on the way to Calumet
55. When you snuck out of your house for the first time, who was it with?	: I don't think I ever had to...
56. Who was your first Best Friend and are you still friends with them?	: My best friend always has been my cousin Jim, and yes, I talk to him all the time! My best friends from school were Amy and Laura and I still talk to them too - just not as much as I would like!
57. Where did you live the first time you moved out of your parent	: My apartment with Kelli
58. Who is the first person you call when you have a bad day?	: Depends on the time of day...Scott, Jada, my mom...
59. Who	: never been in a wedding but my own
60. What is the first thing you do in the morning?	: yawn
61. What was the first concert you attended?	: George Michael - the Faith Tour 1988
62. First tattoo or piercing?	: First piercing would be my ears when I was six...first tattoo was the angel on my shoulder when I was 21
63. First celebrity crush?	: Han Solo!

Take this survey - 63 Annoying Questions
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Time for a change

2008-10-06T08:52:00.002-04:00

I believe it is. Maybe it is the change of season, but I feel I am ready for the next phase of my life. It seems to be a good time too...things seem well and looking up for our family, and for that I am very thankful. Now I have to overcome my next hurdle. Lack of energy.

It appears that I do have a lot at times - not to me mind you, but to others when I tell them all I do in a normal week. Maybe they are just being nice. Maybe they understand 100% and are sympathetic. Maybe some think that I am crazy and are just trying not to set me off or something...who knows. Personally, I feel like I don't do enough...but then when I think about what I accomplish in a normal day, I guess its a lot. I don't know. I suppose I have more hours in the day to work with because of the hours I work.

The scary thing is that when I really have some energy and apply myself I can accomplish way more than I imagine. I wish it could be like that every day. I wish I didn't get headaches and that I could just operate at full speed until it is time for me to sleep.

So my goals for this fall are:

To stop worrying so much
Get the kids excited about learning things they don't know they want to...
spend more time with my husband and appreciate him more
stop complaining so much (though, once you find something you are good at...)
better organize things around my home...like the laundry...
begin working out again...I always feel so much better
stop and enjoy things...rarely do I do this!

I think that is enough...maybe if I can accomplish my goals I will have more energy and time for the things I love doing. I will let you know...stay tuned!

It appears I just might make it...

2008-09-30T03:16:00.002-04:00

So, I tried to get the night off, but I was told to come into work, so I did. I had a busy evening and am surprised at the energy I currently have, though I know that it could be gone at a moment's notice!

So...my busy evening....I was looking in the fridge to make something for dinner - I didn't really grocery shop recently because we were going camping and didn't see the point. So we had no food. So I rounded up the troops and we went shopping...not before some neighborhood drama. We have a wonderful...WONDERFUL neighbor on one side of us. The other side, not so much. If you have read previous blogs, you will know this as the mold infested house that the trailer park kids set on fire. A family moved in last Christmas, and they have been making an attempt at fixing up the property. They just have no idea what they are doing AND they are rude and inconsiderate of their neighbors. A perfect example of their rudeness: They were having some trees taken down. Fine, no problem. The problem I had was the strange man running around my back yard without my permission. I was so angry that I called the police because he was trespassing. These "people" that they had taking the tree down stood in the drive way next door and laughed at me while I spoke to the officer. They essentially broke into my property and seemed to think it was a joke. Did I get an apology from my neighbors? No. So today when my husband returned from running an errand and saw the huge mound of dirt piled right next to our privacy fence (over the property line AND right up next to the wood so that it could rot) it was kind of the last straw. He removed the dirt from up next to our fence and posted a sign bringing to their attention the fact that they were on our property. So, we went grocery shopping. When we return, instead of talking to us themselves, they send over the woman's brother to talk to us. That was fun. I got to hear him complain to us that they have no idea why we are calling the police...(trespassing is apparently no big deal to him, and blocking someone's driveway so they can't get out isn't either.) As we explained to him what was going on, I think he started to understand why we were unhappy. I think. At any rate, Sydney tripped on the driveway and skinned her knee, and the discussion was complete. We took the kids and groceries into the house and I tended to Sydney's knee.

I made dinner, and still needed to shower. Plus, I really needed to do my roots, so, I colored my hair. By this time it was almost 9pm. No nap for me so far today. So Scott put the kids to bed and I decided that one hour of nap was better than nothing, and tried to fall asleep as fast as possible. I woke up to the alarm on my phone screaming at 10pm, more tired than I was in the first place. I was smart and planned ahead and had the coffee pot all ready to go, so I brewed some Traverse City Cherry Coffee...YUM!

On the way to work, I got a little freaked out...there were just crazy things happening all over. First of all, it rained. That meant that the majority of the people that would be on the road would not be able to drive. It always amazes me when there is some kind of precipitation on the roads in Michigan. Usually, we get a lot of snow, and it would seem that most people on the roads here learned to drive in the weather, yet as soon as you see a raindrop or a snowflake, they lose their heads and with that, their ability to drive. So as I drive west on 17 Mile Road (dark two lane road - usually no one is on it when I go to work), I get stuck behind someone drive at least ten miles under the speed limit. No joke. That worries me a little because I wonder what the hell is going on in the car, or if they are up to something sinister. I mean, it is dark when I drive to work and I am alone. Maybe I should stay of the dark two lane road, you say? Perhaps, but it usually travels well. So, when I approach John R and the left turn light is green, I go instead of sitting behind this yahoo that can't read a speed limit sign.

As I approach Big Beaver, I notice lots of flashing lights. There had to be about eight police cars - there were officers directing traffic - a wrecker towing one of the cars in the accident. I waited my turn and left, figuring that when I got to work there would be a trauma either starting or coming up. I drive some more and come to Crooks. As I approach 13 Mile Road, it is pretty dark. Yeah. All of the power was out for almost a mile. That is what I could see...I don't know it could have been more. Then I got a little excited - I was pretty close to work. Maybe the power would be out there!! Right. Keep dreaming. No such luck. Then it started to rain harder.

So that is about it. Kind of exciting, yet totally mundane all at once. I have made it past the halfway point of my shift and am doing pretty ok. I even have kind of a positive attitude. I think it was my fancy coffee...I might have to make a habit of it!

Celebrity Collage by MyHeritage

2008-09-29T11:32:00.001-04:00

MyHeritage: Family tree - Genealogy - Celeb - Collage - Morph

Looking for encouragement

2008-09-29T11:27:00.001-04:00

I have decided to start writing again. Since I have issue with staying motivated, I am looking for encouragement so that I can refer back when I need it.

Please and thank you!

And another thing...

2008-09-29T10:48:00.002-04:00

SCATTERGORIES...it's harder than it looks! Use the 1st letter of your name to answer each of the following.They have To be real places, names, things..nothing made up! Try to use different answers if the person in front of you had the same 1st initial.
You CAN'T use your name for the boy/girl name question.

WHAT IS YOUR NAME? Melanie

4 LETTER WORD: Muck

BOY NAME: Mark

GIRL NAME: Marcia

OCCUPATION: Magician

A COLOR: Magenta

SOMETHING YOU WEAR: Monocle

BEVERAGE Mead

FOOD: Macaroni

SOMETHING FOUND IN A BATHROOM: Mirror

A PLACE: Maldives

REASON FOR BEING LATE: Manipulative monkeys

SOMETHING YOU SHOUT: Man!

Interesting...

2008-09-29T10:45:00.001-04:00

HowManyOfMe.com

There are
1
or fewer people with my name in the U.S.A.

How many have your name?

As my time off draws to a close...

2008-09-29T09:43:00.002-04:00

I don't know if I need my medication adjusted or if I just really don't want to go back to work...or maybe both. I also did not take any Alli while off and ate like crap, so I also feel like a whale and that probably isn't helping matters either.

So, my vacation was really nice. It started hectic. Scott was sick and I had to get everything ready for Sydney's birthday party by myself. That went well...she was a very happy girl. We found out that her Godfather, Steve, was moving to Philadelphia at the end of the week, which was a bummer, but I guess that gives us another place to think about visiting. Even though we rarely go anywhere. After I cleaned up from the party, it was time to get out camping stuff together. Just one way to describe that...a big pile of crap next to the front door that we had to figure a way of getting into the car (we took Scott's parent's car because it gets excellent gas mileage. The drawback...NO ROOM TO BREATHE!) It all fit somehow, and we embarked on our journey the next morning.

Literally the whole way there, Sydney asked, "Are we almost there yet?" Not that I find that grating or anything... Scott and I decided on the way up to win the lottery and move up north. I tried to nap. It didn't work. Finally around 2pm we pulled into the Traverse City State Park Campground. We started setting up the tent. Yes tent. For those of you who know me personally, I understand this is shocking, but I do sleep in a tent from time to time.

The kids were restless, so I took them to the grocery store. We got back and Scott had everything done. We then had to go to the store as our air mattress had several holes in it and would not hold air...you didn't honestly think I was going to sleep on the floor of the tent, did you? That would be like sleeping on the ground and I may as well not have the tent over my head, and that is NOT happening!!

We spent the next day at the Sleeping Bear Sand Dunes. Beautiful. The kids loved it. Sydney climbed to the top of everything we would allow her. Gabriel loved the sand and the flock of wild turkeys that we saw by the side of the road. After the Dunes, we headed to downtown Traverse City and were disappointed to find that the zoo was no longer there. So instead we watched the trout swimming upstream in the canal and then walked through the shops.

As we drove from downtown back toward the campground, we stopped and I did something I did not expect to do...I got another tattoo...it had been about eleven years since my last. I got five purple stars behind my right ear. It symbolizes the family plus the one more we plan to have in the next year or two. I love it!

The next day we went to Mackinac Island. (we also decided to stay an extra day). More fun...lots of history at the fort, we found some hot sauce called "Ass Reaper" - the bottle is dressed like the grim reaper. Of course, we got it. Fun on the ferry to and from St. Ignace - the kids have now been to the UP. And, can I just say, it is amazing how much the landscape changes as soon as you cross the bridge. We checked out the Straits State Park right there too...that may be a camping destination for next summer!

Our final full day we spent at the lighthouse, a very cool general store (where I found interesting books on the history of Michigan...I am now obsessed with the odd happenings in the past on Beaver Island), the beach and playing miniature golf. We had a huge fire and spent the coldest night the whole week up there.

The way home was crowded. Love that car. Again with the "Are we almost there?" and finally we were home. I started doing loads and loads of laundry - its still not done - and cleaning the dirt off of the children, who despite showering twice a day, were filthy! Also, as soon as we got home, we all needed our tech fixes!! Both computers went on, as well as the television! Ahhhhh! Civilization!

So now my vacation winds down. I dread going back to work - I should have taken one more night off. I am downing water to try and flush the junk food out of my system.

I really don't want to go back to work...I need to set this plan of winning the lottery into action. I suppose I should think about purchasing a ticket...

Some Vacation Pics from Traverse City

2008-09-27T11:09:00.001-04:00

WTF?? Seriously...

2008-09-20T01:38:00.002-04:00

Ladies, you will appreciate this.

I wake for work, writhing in pain. I am bummed that I even have to go in tonight as my vacation starts at the end of my shift, and I just assume start it sooner. So, I get up and take some motrin. I get ready for work. The motrin isn't working. I stop at a CVS on my way to work, which by the way was hopping on a Friday night. I guess there is nothing better to do in Michigan than hang out in a pharmacy. Wait, no, not really. There isn't.

I navigate my way through the aisles looking for very specific things. I get them and go to pay for them. First of all, I look like hell warmed over. I slept horribly today and the motrin never started to work, so I have a strained look on my face that I can totally feel. I set on the counter the following things: peanut m & m's, two twenty ounce bottles of coke, midol, and a box of tampons. The lady behind the counter actually had the nerve to ask me how I was doing. Really. Are you kidding?? How does it appear that I am doing, because this is about it right now. I can hardly stand and it is obvious. So, no, I am not digging through my wallet for my CVS card. I will not save twenty five cents. I don't care. I want to get out to my car and take my Midol.

Its kind of like how Always, the sanitary napkin company puts, "Have a nice period" on their packaging and in their ads. How about you kiss my ass.

Seriously.

tic tic tic

2008-09-17T10:54:00.003-04:00

The neurologist said to expect it, but that doesn't make it any easier. Gabriel's tics, related to his Tourette's Syndrome, have gotten a little worse. In addition to the other things, which actually have improved on his Risperdal, he now has to repeat the "S" sound at the end of a word at least five times, and he has to walk around in a circle before entering a room or the car. I have been trying not to make a big deal, but yesterday Sydney was yelling at him - which technically IS her job...she is his little sister - and I got so mad! I had to sit her down and talk to her and try to explain why she needs to give him a break sometimes. Then I just cried. I just wish I could fix it for him or that it was me and not him.

We are taking the kids camping in Traverse City next week. I am hoping that the change of scenery will settle things down.

PICTURE TIME!!

2008-09-17T10:24:00.001-04:00

What the hell is wrong??

2008-09-17T03:08:00.001-04:00

Well, let me tell you! A lot. Where to begin?

I called my father.

The biological one.

The one that I wonder why about.

The one who worries me.

The one who doesn't deserve it.

Background, please you ask?? OK. For those of you who have known me for a long time, you know that I have not always had the best relationship with my father. My parents fought when I was a child, and finally divorced when I was 18. He still drinks. A lot. That would be the primary issue. Now, I have no problem with someone having a drink...but he has a drinking problem. He has been drinking so much for so long that i seriously doubt he is ever completely sober. I don't even want to know what condition his liver must be in at this point.

He really does not remember things the right way...if at all. I was accused of several things as a teenager that I never did, but that he saw in a movie or one of his sisters or someone he knew did or sometimes he just made it up. Imagined it. Because of this, I had a bit of a breakdown, and could not deal with him at all and did not talk to him for several years. I had to do this because if I had not, I may have turned into him, and that was the last thing I wanted.

About two years ago, while talking to my mom, it hit me that my brother might get married one day. How horrible would it be for him if his family could not get along for his wedding. So, I took a huge step and contacted him. After that we talked occasionally on the phone - both very cautious. Eventually we got together and he was able to meet his grandchildren. Finally, I thought, everything can be normal.

Wrong. Here is where I get confused. Mainly because I have no idea what happened. This past spring and early summer, my father and I would chat on the phone about every other week...maybe a little more. On Father's Day in June, I called him because I was going to stop by and visit for a bit and give him a gift. He did not answer his phone, so I left a message. (Mind you, he did this last year and by the time Sydney's birthday party rolled around in September he was fine.) Based on last year, I did not think much of it. About a week ago, I sent him an e-mail inviting him for cake and ice cream for Sydney's birthday. I heard nothing from him, so I decided to call him. BIG mistake. It was if I was calling him out of no where after not speaking for twenty years and me thinking everything was fine. He was short and rude, and could not have sounded more irritated. He had no interest what so ever in hearing about the kids at all. OH - and he couldn't take an hour out of his Sunday to drive two miles to come to his granddaughter's 6th birthday party. I believe we were on the phone for three minutes. It was enough.

So, I am back in the same boat that I was before I started speaking with him again two years ago, except this time I don't know why. So what the hell is wrong?? That is an excellent question.

All these things that I've done...

2008-09-13T15:37:00.000-04:00

So what, do you ask, have I done since the last time I slept??? Let's take a look, shall we??

I woke up around 6:30 am on Friday morning. I was disappointed about this because I knew that I was working a double that night and I would be super tired. I sat on the computer for a bit, egg hunting (stupid vice!) and then I watched a movie I had been wanting to see that happened to be on television. "Reign Over Me". It was sad. But good. But sad. And I think it had a little something to do with what happened next. I was in a crappy mood - depressed from the movie, and pissed that I had to go to work. I got into a horrible argument, via e-mail, no less. Let me tell you how wonderful it is when you can pick up on someone's tone and inflection in the words that they type. Yeah. Not so much, right?? So that simmered down after we had a chance to chat, and then it was time to finally push the kids in to finishing getting ready for the day. Mind you, by this time it was almost noon. Love homeschooling on these days! After Gabriel finished his forty five minute shower, that was actually complete with shampoo and soap, and getting Sydney to allow me to brush the mop on top of her head, I had to wait for them to get their shoes on. This is no easy feat, as there are many distractions to be distracted by. They were actually quick about it, so we headed to the mall to pick up a gift for our neighbor - he is a HUGE Notre Dame fan and the big game against Michigan is happening as I write. (He is having a party, which my husband is attending, and I hope to later, however, I am with the kids while they watch the "Evolve" marathon currently running on the History Channel. It could possibly be a long night. And there is lots of food next door...grrr!) We got home and it was time for me to get ready for work. I quickly showered and cursed the humidity for what I knew it was going do to my hair over the course of the next eighteen hours. I threw my bag together, said good bye to the kids, making them vow not to fight, and rattled something off for Scott to feed them all for dinner.

I left. Traffic sucked. It was raining. Hard. There was no parking at work. It was humid. I hate the humidity. I already had a headache.

I worked the afternoon shift (3p - 1130p) in the north tower operating room. I billed, took care of the schedule, started midnight shift work, talked to many many old people, and ate the new reduced fat "healthier choice" macaroni and cheese that the cafeteria is now serving on Fridays. Yummy. No pools (literally) of grease collecting on the tops of the yummy casseroles. It IS a hospital - they have to encourage us to take care of ourselves to keep their medical insurance premiums down. I wish them all the luck in the world. Right before the end of my shift, there was some excitement - an emergent heart case was coming up. I had a list of people to call. Whew...I was happy to be travelling to the other tower for the remainder of the night!

For the second half of my shift, I worked in the south tower operating room - this is where the orthopaedic and neuro cases go down. I sat in the waiting room with parents waiting for their son to have his ankles debrided. Both of the televisions were on in the waiting room - tuned into conflicting cable news networks. I saw Geraldo Rivera almost get blown away by the winds of Hurricaine Ike slamming into Galveston, Texas. Did I mention the volume level on the televisions?? LOUD! The odd thing was, as chaotic as the story they were all reporting was, it seemed to calm the nervous parents - took them away from their thoughts, I suppose. So the rest of the night, work, work, work. Exciting paperwork - try to contain your jealousy...we can't all be me!

After work, I was heading to a mom to mom sale that was on my way home from work. I was supposed to be meeting one of my co-workers, Shannon, and we were going to cover almost every age group at the sale between our children. We thought the sale started at 9am, however, when I pulled into the church parking lot where it was being held, there was an early bird special...you could come in 30 minutes early for $1.00 more. I did, because I was so tired at that point, it was totally worth my dollar! I was in and out with a TON of clothes in twenty minuted. I got pretty much every item there that would fit my children. Yay me!! I didn't see Shannon, and I left for home. I got there ten minutes after I thought the sale would be starting. That made me feel awesome and a little - JUST A LITTLE - rejuvinated.

Somehow, when I got home, after I showed the kids their new wardrobes, I got suckered into helping my husband finish up the job he had been doing next door. (He is a builder and was putting in a new floor). That was about two hours. Well then I was off. I figured I would feel better if I got some stuff done around the house. I folded about two hundred loads of laundry and got them all upstairs - this is one thing I HATE doing...this and emptying the dishwasher, which by the way, needs to be done as it is done running. Then I cleaned up the kitchen, dining room and family room - all complete disasters. Then I showered. Now could die I am so tired. I can not wait to go to sleep...but there is a party next door with food that I don't have to make...I guess I can sleep when I die, right??

Sorry for the mundaneness (is that even a word??), but I can't sit though "Evolve"...it could possibly put me to sleep!

E-Mail Sucks

2008-09-12T10:29:00.000-04:00

Really it does. It is so easy to completely misunderstand the person you are talking to and vice versa. It messes everything up and makes people sad and angry with each other. There should be some universal way to type - with font or color or something - that makes it perfectly clear if you are being sarcastic, joking, or are actually angry.

So, do you remember what you were doing seven years ago???

2008-09-11T10:16:00.000-04:00

I sure do. Gabriel was ten months old. I had just finished feeding him some rice cereal for breakfast and was giving him a bottle. He burped, spit up a little - because he always did - and then I was flipping through the channels. Instead of putting Playhouse Disney right on, which is usually what I did, I put The Today Show on. The television was not very loud and Scott called. I was talking to him and looking at the t.v. Not really registering what I was seeing. For some reason, I have no idea why, I thought they were talking about the World Trade Center subway bombing from a few years before. He had to go, so I turned the volume up. About two minutes later, the second plane crashed. I didn't know what to think. I called Scott back and told him. He didn't believe me. It was insane. As first he wanted me to bring him a portable television to his store, but then he decided that wouldn't be a very good idea - no one knew what was coming next. Then the plane crash at the Pentagon....then the field in Pennsylvania. He didn't want me driving to Pontiac. I was glued to the television until noon. At that point I was numb. I had to get away. I was afraid to drive too far. The new Farmer Jack (which has since become a Kroger) opened either that day or the day before - it was half a mile away. I took Gabriel there for some baby food as it was on sale. I remember what a beautiful day it was. So sunny...bright fluffy clouds in the sky. The air in the store was surreal. Everyone walked around with the same shocked look on their face. The energy was very sad and dirty almost, which was very odd because the sun was so bright and the store was so clean and shiny and new. We stocked up and went home. The rest of the day I kept the news on and played with Gabriel. The FAA said nothing could fly. It was very strange around four in the afternoon - we lived by a small airport at the time, and there was usually a lot of air traffic from about 4pm until 9pm. It was eerily calm. I talked to Scott's cousin Danielle on the phone while I fed Gabriel dinner. We were both completely freaked out! Scott got home from work and then it was time for my shift. Then my new paranoia set in. At the time none of us knew what was really going on. I was then scared that "they" were targeting tall buildings. Well, I work in a tall building...and it would have been a perfect innocent civilian target as it is a hospital and filled with lots of sick people and those who have devoted their lives to helping them. I left home fearful I would never see my baby or husband again. I cried. The feeling at work was much the same as at the grocery store. Shock...despair...darkness. We listened to NPR on-line. We were told that casualties may be airlifted to Selfridge Air National Guard Base and then brought to us because of our facility's Level One Trauma status. About an hour before I was to leave, a code was called over head that meant all hospital personnel must report to their work stations and await further instructions. No one was to leave the hospital. That just about sent me over the edge. My co-worker that night, Joan (rest in peace - she passed a couple years later) was so calming. Had it not been for here, I would have had a breakdown I think. Finally, the code was lifted and only Emergency Center personnel was to remain. I was so thankful. I went home and hugged my family and passed out from sheer exhaustion.

Over the next few days and weeks we started to find out exactly what had happened. Everything turned from darkness to red white and blue.

Please take a moment to remember those who died today. I have.

On a side note...today is my 13th anniversary at Beaumont.

Call 911 - the house next door is on fire.

2008-09-10T13:37:00.000-04:00

Well, here is another one from myspace from about a year ago. The sad thing is that someone bought the decrepit house and did not clean the mold and they have children living there. Here's to the spores that will love their nice warm moist lungs!

So, the house next door to me had been vacant for about a year. We had horrible neighbors who did not take care of their property and they liked to park in front of my driveway and block me in - I can't tell you how many times I almost hit their car backing out. We called the police several times while they lived there - we would hear death threat and fighting on Saturday afternoons while outside trying to play with our kids. I think I can count on one hand how many times they mowed the lawn while we were living next door to them. They also had a statue of the Virgin Mary standing in the middle of a whiskey barrel with weeds growing up around it - it was kind of sacreligious. Since the property was so unkempt the city came out and posted a sign about how it had numerous code violations and there would be a hearing. The city ended up cleaning up the outside the October before they fled. I can only image what that must have cost. After they left the FBI came around and were asking questions about them. I can not make this up.

When they left the house, they left the water on. The gas had been shut off, and this is Michigan, so the pipes froze. The day before Easter this past spring, my nieghbor on the other side took his son in law over to show him the backyard - we live on a curve and have abnormally sized and shaped yards - that backyard is HUGE, and he was trying to get him to buy the house. (It also butts up to a trailer park - more on that later...). They looked in the window and the ceiling was on the floor. Literally all over the floor. The pipes had burst and it was a big mess. My neighbor called the city and they came out and turned the water off. The next day he came over to get my husband and show him the mess. (We had all been collectively hoping the people that lived there would move and that we would get normal people to move in - we all tried to get someone we knew to buy the house - not any more!!) He was shocked - and it takes A LOT to shock him. So this became our new thing to chat about - and collectively hope that the house would just be condemned because we would all rather look at an empty lot than that shit hole. Our street is nice - everyone takes care of their yards and houses. This is the only one that does not. After several calls complaining to the city, they now come out every other week and mow the lawn, and a bank has bought the house from the County Sherrif who siezed the house back in December. The bank has cleaned up the inside (except for the black mold growing on the walls)..not that it matters anymore!

So, my husband was getting ready to take the kids to visit his parents, and I was getting their shoes out of the front closed. I smelled smoke, but didn't think much of it because I was really tired - I worked twelve hour midnigts last night and was busy. My husband had seen the smoke and ran outside because he was worried it was one of the cars. He ran in and told me to call 911 because the house next door was on fire. I did, and then I ran outside. Sure enough there was grey smoke everywhere. We waitied for the fire department to arrive. Not two minutes later three boys ages 8 - 11 maybe came running out from the backyard. One of them was holding a big stick with a point on the end and a what looked to be a rusted or charred coffee can. They told us that the fire was on the stairs and they they had put it out. (I suppose they got the water from the foot of standing mold water in the basement since there is none running to the house). Something wasn't right. One of them did all the talking - he changed his story a few times before every one arrived on the scene. Now, I hate to stereo type, but when it is this easy...they looked like they came from the trailer park. They were all dirty. The one had a ratty mowhawk that descended into a tail at the nape of his neck. The talker told me at one point they were playing golf with very old clubs - five year old clubs - and that when they saw the fire start they were so overcome that they broke a few of them. They also told us that they saw a man in a red baseball hat walking away, which was funny because my husband had been out side right before it started and didn't see anyone. I told them they had no business running into a buring building and that they should have gotten an adult and called 911. Did I mention the look of terror on all of their faces when they saw us standing in our driveway with phones in hand? Oh yeah - scared shitless. (The talker's voice sounded really high pitched like someone who is seriously backtracking). The talker told me that if you ever catch on fire to remember to stop drop and roll. Thank God he payed attention during "Fire Safety Week", eh?

We heard the sirens getting closer and the boys said they had to go put their bucket away - I didn't think they would come back, but just as the FOUR firetrucks, six cop cars and numerous fire department vehicles pulled up, they came out of the backyard again - probably because we knew what they looked like and they probably thought that I was buying their Good Samaritain story. My husband went directly to the nearest police officer and told him about the boys. The boys went nowhere after that - that is without a police escort. It was like having "COPS" live in front of my house. We sat on the porch and watched - my husband made a sandwich.

Sure enough, the coffee can was not enough to extinguish the fire and the house was still smoking when the first fireman busted the door open with an axe - I think that was one of my favorite parts. They rallied and overcame the blaze. Two arson investigators arrived and there is now a mobile laboratory sitting in the driveway next door.

It took about an hour and a half, but the excitement started to subside...neighbors went back to their homes (however, everyone is out mowing their lawns). One of the police officers approached us after they had separated the boys and questioned them all individually. They also got a lecture as they sat on the sidewalk waiting to see what would come their way next. The officer that came up to us said that they changed their stories with them too, and they were just waiting for their parents to arrive so they could take them to the station for more questioning.

OK, now this is my favorite part. The parents of the boys that were brothers arrived. (The boys were being put in the squad car). They were in a ratty old child moletser looking van. The dad had a stars and stripes doo rag on his head, high tops, 20 year old shorts and NO SHIRT ON. (Hello, trailer park, "COPS"). The mother looked like she passed out on a bar last night with a cigarette stuck to her bottom lip and when her cell phone rang telling her that her boys were under arrest, it woke her up. The cigarette was still attached to her lip --she didn't even put her smoke out when she got out of the molstermobile. She looked rough. Total trailer trash. It was so amazing I couldn't believe it was unfolding RIGHT IN FRONT OF MY HOUSE!!!

So three and a half hours later, the fire department is still investigating for signs of arson and damage (though I don't know how much worse that house could be) . I am sure all of the boys need clean drawers, and I want to go over there and look around so bad I could die!!

Reflections of...

2008-09-06T17:24:00.000-04:00

So, as promised, I just re-read what I wrote last night. So let me begin.

I have met and chatted with some very nice people online through hatchlings on Facebook...Barb is totally one of them, and I am so thankful for that!! Still! Even if I was bummed at first when she passed me:)

Now, as for the ambien and the reflections...I was sitting on the computer typing last night and I had my contacts out of my eyes and my glasses on. I kept seeing the strangest reflections (I guess) bouncing off the back of my glasses...that combined with the sleeping aid (which, unfortunately, I do need) and the fact that I had been up for so long made for some freakiness. Luckily, I had no bad dreams and wasn't afraid of the dark.

See, I am not THAT crazy!!

a community of egg heads

2008-09-06T00:33:00.000-04:00

who knew that when i accepted an application on facebook from my cousin Becky a couple of days before easter what it would turn into. at first i was content to find an egg in my profile. then i started searching a little. by the next round i was a fiend. i was off like a rocket, and then this lady who was behind me started sending me messages that she was going to catch up. at first i was irritated. i was being selfish with my hatchlings. and i wanted to be number one. then i started talking to this lady...barb...and she was pretty cool. we have had some very nice conversations and i am now proud to call her part of my crazy hatchlings family. We share new eggs, we chat about our kids and what is going on with us. then it hit me...we are both relatively normal, so there must be more, and lo and behold....there are. They are normal people who just need a little time to unwind and enjoy their egglings.

so tomorrow when i read this again, i have a feeling it will need to be more coherent. taking the ambien my doctor gave me to sleep is wokring.....someone needs to remind me about the reflections i see in my glasses. i am hoping it is the medication and not someone from one step beyond coming to take me away. i seriously feel surrounded right now. weird...i have to call it a night. seriously.

I totally made it!!!!

2008-09-05T23:26:00.000-04:00

I can not believe I am still awake. I can't leave yet because I think as soon as I get up I am going to sprint for the time clock only to get there and have to wait for the longest minute of my life! I am utterly exhausted and not looking forward to having to drive home, but soon enough my contacts will be out of my eyes and I can sleep...at night! What a rare treat! I may even get to go out with my husband tomorrow night...without kids! Dare to dream:)

FYI - when you are in your car you are not invisible.

2008-09-05T16:26:00.000-04:00

So, I am deliriously slap-happy, driving to work for the second time today and as I wait to turn left, there is a gentleman (and I use that term VERY loosely) with a cheesy muscle shirt, greasy hair and mirrored sunglasses, totally ummm...rocking out, I guess you could call it. I mean good for him - it gave me a laugh, but it got me thinking about all of the other things that people do while in their car - some of them not very hygienic...

Just remember...we can see you...you can't tint your windshield!

The kids

2008-09-05T13:11:00.000-04:00

What the hell is wrong with me??

2008-09-05T13:09:00.001-04:00

That is an excellent question. I work midnights. I took a call in for a co-worker on the afternoon shift for today last night. Initially, I volunteered to come in early tonight...6pm. Well, my boss called. I am going in at 3pm. Those three hours make a difference. Seriously. I am going to hate myself very soon.

One more thing for today

2008-09-05T01:43:00.000-04:00

Can I just say...GO KWAME!!! Sorry I missed the party at the Manoogian...right...

Something new in our lives...

2008-09-05T01:38:00.000-04:00

This is from a year ago...might help explain me a bit.

From Web MD:
"What is Tourette's disorder?
Tourette's disorder is a neurological (brain) condition that usually begins in childhood. It causes a child to make sounds or words (vocal tics) and body movements (motor tics) that are beyond his or her control. Tourette's disorder (TD) is also known as Tourette's syndrome and Gilles de la Tourette syndrome. However, not all tics are TD. Your child may have tics and not develop TD.
Motor tics usually begin between ages 3 and 8. Vocal tics can begin as early as age 3, but they usually develop a few years after motor tics. Tics generally are at their worst about age 12. In most children, tics go away or decrease quite a bit in the teen years. But tics can continue into adulthood.
The effect tics have on children varies. Some children have mild tics that have a small impact on their lives. But even mild or infrequent tics may affect your child's self-esteem and relationships with friends and family. Severe and frequent tics may require treatment, including medicine and counseling. Although a child's tics may seem minor, they may interfere with the child's ability to learn and can cause embarrassment.
It is important to remember that:
Tics are not a sign of low intelligence and do not affect intelligence.
The severity of your child's tics is not a good indicator of how well he or she will perform in school or in social situations.
How well your child can cope with tics can be helped by a supportive home, school, and community environment."So for the past week or so, Gabriel has been shaking a lot. It started with his head and gradually made its way down his body. He was having a hard time focusing and talking. We got scared that maybe he was having mini siezures or something. I called our doctor on Sunday night because over the course of a couple of hours he got a lot worse - he was having trouble holding onto things and he was getting upsept about it, which just made things even worse. Our doctor said that he wanted me to take him to emergency to have him evaluated, and get him a CT Scan. So I did. My wonderful parents met me there so I wouldn't have to sit alone. (I opted to have Scott stay at home with Sydney because he gets so anxious in that setting - especially when it could be something bad - that I figured it would be better for him to stay at home. Plus Sydney was very concerned about her brother and it was making her upset. Since mommy had to go with Gabriel, daddy was the next best thing!) There were a bunch of sick kids that night. About five came in at the same time we did and every single one in that group got admitted to the floor. We got back to the treatment area around 9pm. They did his bloodwork - he hated it. They did his CT Scan right after the blooodwork, so he was still upset and did not want to get on the table. He finally calmed down and they let me stay with him while they did the scan. I think that helped. It was really hard for me to watch him because he was trying so hard not to cry and hold his head still at the same time. His poor little face broke my heart. He calmed down after the scan, and we waited.The doctor came to us after midnight and let us know they were going to keep him over night. His bloodwork and CT Scan were normal, so we knew it was nothing life threatening, but they wanted him to see a neurologist and have an EEG done, and if he stayed it would happen a lot faster that if we tried to do them outpatient. At first Gabriel was very upset because he didn't like the noise in the emergency room. He was ok with everything after he found out he would get to go to another room, and after we assured him that he did not live in the hospital, he was just having a sleepover and that mommy wasn't going anywhere. It was about 3am when we got up to the room. Then they had to do another evaluation, and the new residents he would be seeing had to do their evaluations. My parents left about forty five minutes later, after making a run to the cafeteria because Gabriel needed Cinnamon Toast Crunch, and I had nothing for dinner. After they left, the resident came back because he forgot to ask me some questions. Gabriel fell asleep with his cereal while the doctor was there. I fell asleep around 0430 am.Our regular doctor came to see us around 0630 am. Gabriel had the EEG done at 0800 am. He did not like them drawing on his head - they had to make a bunch of marks for all of the leads and it was upsetting to him. It probably took an hour longer than usual for his test, but they got it done. He got back to his room and wanted pop tarts. Scott and Sydney stopped at Costco and got him the orange Mega T-Rex he had his eye on and came to the hospital to sit with us. The secretary came and told us it would be between 5 and 6 pm before the neurologist could come see us, so at least we had a time frame!My mom came back, and we all spent the day together. It was nice, except for the whole Gabriel was in the hospital thing! My mom and I took Sydney for a few walks, we got Gabriel some little presents, went to the pharmacy for some motrin, got some coffee...finally the neurologist came. She was wonderful. Gabriel liked her, she made us all feel at east, and she had an answer for us. All of his little tics and noises and running around are the result of Tourette's Syndrome. It is treatable with medication. The medication will probably make him sleep and gain some weight - both things he needs!Now, I know that when most people think of this disorder they think of what they have seen on tv and in the movies. You know, the person yelling foul words loudly in inappropriate situations and making scary jerky motions with their body. OK, it is that bad in about 1% of people who have this disorder. Plus most children outgrow it after it peaks in severity at age 12. It is also way underdiagnosed, and most people who have it don't even know they do!I also got another piece of validation. I had more than one doctor tell me how good it is for him that I am homeschooling him!!! I couldn't lose!So, we are cautiously optimistic and very relieved. Gabriel is happy because he is acutely aware of what he does and very frustrated that he can not stop it. It is just another one of those things!!

and then about a month later...

The Effect of Chewing Gum on Tourette's Syndrome

Gabriel is doing much better. He has been taking his prescrition meds for about a week - every time he takes a pill he looks at it and says, "Be better with pills!" It is very sweet. He is talking clearer, his movements are more fluid, and he is sleeping A LOT better. I also stumbled onto something that keeps the tics at bay - he chews gum. Its like they make his body more concerned with the chewing, and he is even stiller (is that a word?). He has been a little sick, so that was kind of a bummer. He had a fever for a few days at the end of last week, and completely lost his appetite, but it is slowly coming back. It just scares me a little because he really didn't have any weight to spare, and not eating for a couple days really didn't do much for him, but one of the likely side effects of his meds is a weight gain, so we are really hoping for it to happen! He has such a hard time keeping it on because he is always moving, so maybe since he is not quite constantly on the go he won't burn as many calories. He has also started taking naps in the middle of the day - he hasn't done that since he was about 18 months old, consistantly anyway. He has been a little congested, but that could just be left over from his fever. He has been extremely affectionate - he loves mommy a lot again - and he seems happier. Here's to hoping it keeps on keeping on!

Triangle Sandwiches

2008-09-05T01:37:00.000-04:00

Another from this summer...

Something happens to you as you get older. You forget simple things that made perfect sense and you just knew as a child. I am not entirely sure when it happens, but I suspect that it begins in our teen years when we try to distance ourselves from being a child as much as we can. All we want at that point is to be treated as an adult (though as we all know, NONE of us deserve that title at that point in our lives, and we are far too dumb, unworldly and self absorbed to realize that). Then in our early twenties we are too busy with the business of (hopefully) getting ourselves together. Then one day you find yourself with children. You are always in a frenzied rush and exhausted from taking care of the children, your home, your spouse (who often seems to need more care than the children), and working. There is never enough time or energy for the things that you would really love to devote those precious things to...you make lunch for the kids. Sandwiches. They will not eat them until they are cut into triangles. They look at you like you are crazy because you expect them to eat a giant square. Don't you know that they taste so much better when cut into triangles. You think about this and wonder - its not as if the contents of the sandwich are any different - they are just cut into a different shape. You ask the kids about this and they look at you with pity because you just don't get it.I have observed a phenomenon though. I think that we regain this vital and basic information one day. I have seen my mother and her understanding of how important these things are when she interacts with her grandchildren.There is hope!

The Earth is a whiny little bitch...

2008-09-05T01:34:00.000-04:00

From a couple of months ago...this just creeps me out...

Who knew...from space, the Earth sounds wretched...!http://www.space.com/php/video/player.php?video_id=080627-earth-sounds

YIKES!

And did you know that if you are out in the middle of nowhere and you set your car radio to am and do your best to get it tuned in between two stations (this worked a lot easier when there where knobs on the radios) you can hear Jupiter moaning.

And we’re off...and strolling

2008-09-05T01:33:00.001-04:00

From 9/3/08

Well, the new homeschool year started yesterday...for us anyway. It is, as anything new (kind of new), a major adjustment. Yesterday after we finished our work, the kids and I discussed at length why going to bed earlier is a great idea. It worked last night...hopefully it holds up long enough to become a habit. I can't tell you the last time that I left for work and they were both in their own beds asleep. Same goes for working every morning. They are plugging away at their Austrailia vocabulary right now (we pick a new country every month and learn about it). As long as they keep doing what I want, life should be good.So far my house is still standing, they are behaving, and I am not dozing off while driving home from work. I am even a little on the organized side. Yay me!

Right, so I am dying at the moment...

2008-09-05T01:31:00.000-04:00

From 9/4/08

Poor time management skills on my part...hmmmm, I don't think so. The inability to fall asleep and stay asleep...getting warmer. The rain? I think we have a winner! Normal people tend to sleep better when it rains...hence the term, "Good sleeping weather". Me, on the other hand, not so much. I wake up feeling worse than before I went to sleep. Even if the air conditioner is on. I sleep horrible and wake up with a killer headache. KILLER. My head is throbbing, and my eyes are convulsing in an attempt to stay open. So, what am I doing blogging about this, you ask? Well, I have a job that I work midnights at...DUH! So, again you ask, why am I blogging about this if I am at work? Well, for starters, my boss is on Facebook, not Myspace. And two, the system I work in is painfully slow to pull up each record that I audit, so I have to do something while I wait or my head will be bouncing off the cheap formica counter that they call a desk. Then I will have a concussion and not be allowed sleep. That would be the end of the world...even if it is raining.

I think I would be much better living in the desert. My hair would appreciate the lack of humidity too.

From the beginning...

2008-09-05T00:22:00.000-04:00

Here I am. The whole myspace thing wasn't working exactly how I wanted, plus I don't really check it a whole lot any more. So look for more in the future! I am going to add my last couple of my space posts just because...